This week has probably been one of the busiest of my entire year. I'm so grateful for all the opportunities I've been given lately, and all the people I was able to connect with. That said, the past 7 days have been an absolute whirlwind, and I've barely had time to catch my breath. To make sense of it all, I decided to take a little snapshot of what this week looked like, and the lessons I learned along the way.
Friday:
Last Friday was St. Patrick's Day. For those of you who have known me for a while, you probably know I'm not the biggest fan of themed days, for a number of reasons. But lately I realized that each person's experiences are unique to them, and ultimately these days are what I make of them. So before catching a flight to the Jack Summit, I was on duty and my duty team and I made green pancakes for everyone (apparently pancakes are the one dessert item I just can't make... shoutout to Anya for saving the day on that one).
That morning was a bit of a hectic one, and after heading to the airport, our flight ended up being delayed for about an hour and a half. Lately I've been thinking a lot about the whole "everything happens for a reason" thing. And I really do believe that there's a lesson to be learned from any experience. While I was initially frustrated with the flight delay and, yes, it did cause me to have a panic attack since the whole week was so busy already and I'm very plan-oriented, I learned that there is value in taking the time that you need for yourself. I also learned that you can do this anywhere. So I found a quiet little corner of the airport with a rocking chair and called my friend (and summit roommate!) Jenna. This whole experience reminded me that I have so many people who care for me, and reminded me that I'm a pretty cool person even if my brain can be a little annoying sometimes. I also learned that you should pack any and all meds in your carry-on bag. Seriously. Do it.
Saturday:
This was the first full day of the Jack Summit. It was long, it was draining, and it was powerful. I actually learned so much and it gave me more tools on managing activist burnout (it is so real). I was able to meet my Wear Your Label girls, who I have been speaking to and collaborating with for months, and spend time with them in my hometown. It was awesome. I'm not going to lie, it was really overwhelming to be around so many people. Even though they all care about similar things that I do, hearing that many people speaking at once, and being in one room with 200+ people is daunting. I ended up very drained by the end of the day, but was able to do some self-care and get some good food with some of the other delegates/WYL girls and was refreshed and re-energized to go for summit day 2, with a better idea of what to expect this time!
Sunday:
The last day of summit. This was the day where we heard from so many amazing speakers. Jeremie from Sickboy Podcast (check them out here was an incredible speaker and I was so motivated and energized to make a difference in my community, because one voice can be powerful! :) After a bit of a tearful goodbye, leaving Jill, Cait, Julissa, and Jenna, I was on my way to see my family (AND GINGER!) Look at this little nugget... isn't she worth flying 2000km for?! My parents also met one of my friends, which made them super excited because living so far away means they don't really know any of the people I talk about consistently.
This was the first time ever I took two full days off of school. For something "unnecessary". But the thing is... it wasn't unnecessary at all! I really needed some self-care after such a busy semester, and taking these two days off to be with my family really made all the difference. If you feel like you need to take time for you... do it. You won't regret it. My time at home made me realize that sometimes you really just need to be with your family, or take a long nap. Sometimes you just have to take some time away from your responsibilities. And that's not selfish - it's healthcare. I always tell other people to take care of themselves, but to be honest I don't always practice what I preach. So this weekend was a new beginning for me... the start of treating myself with radical and unconditional self-love.
Monday:
Less exciting, but I literally just sat watching reruns of Modern Family with my dog and wrote a paper. But my Dad was working from home on Monday, so we did go get sushi cake for lunch... man, that sushi cake is also worth flying 2000km for.
Tuesday:
Flying back to Halifax... BUT I did finish a paper on the flight home, and it was another opportunity to practice taking good care of myself even on a busy travel day. I also found out that airport hummus isn't so great...
Wednesday:
Wednesday was the busiest day of my semester, possibly degree if we're being honest. By the end of it, I literally fell asleep on my floor and did not wake up to move to my bed for 4 or 5 hours. I wrote two midterms that I missed while I was away in Toronto (shoutout to the professors who understood how important this weekend was to me and my mental health), had 4 classes, two meetings, and then... most importantly... my WYL panel! I want to give a huge shoutout to Mary for helping me so much with this, and being the lovely host for the panel.
I'm so grateful that Kayley and Addie were able to come up to speak on the panel, and every time I see them I am just instantly calm. It's so relaxing to just be with people who 100% get it, and hearing them verbalize things I've been thinking in my head for years while speaking on the panel made my heart happy. They did an amazing job, and I'm so happy with the turnout of the event and the questions that audience members asked! After the panel, we went out for dinner (my bank account hates me but treating yourself to good Italian food and conversation is literally the best self-care on the planet), and the whole night, and the conversations we had make me so excited all over again to do the things that I do.
Thursday:
Thursday I had to get back into school mode *for real*. But the day started off at a WYL shoot with new role models and brand ambassadors! It was super fun to meet everyone and I got to spend the morning at my favourite café (seriously, check Dilly Dally out) doing what I love with my favourite people. It was the perfect hideaway for such a chilly day, and I was definitely re-energized before heading back to campus for class.
Thursday night was the Impact Awards. While I was exhausted at this point, it was really nice to get real food and see some amazing performances. Maritime Bhangra Group made me so happy and I swear is the positivity everyone needs in their lives. After the awards, I went on a road trip with my friend to pick her mom up from the airport, and enjoyed the weird looks of people wondering why I was carrying a gym bag with my hair and makeup done. When I got home, it took me 40 minutes to take off my makeup, reminding me yet again why I am annoyed with the beauty industry.
Friday:
I spent Friday getting back into the swing of things with school, and taking time off from doing homework in favour of spending time with friends. I went to my favourite café, and read an article that Laura and I are in - check it in the Dal Gazette :)
I was also on duty that night, but even managed to self-care while working (it's literally possible any time anywhere, so y'all don't have an excuse not to make self-care part of your life). For me, that meant showering with the radio and praying that it didn't go off, and making sure to feed myself good food to help my body keep going through this busy week.
Saturday:
Today, ending this wild week, I am hibernating in the library to catch up on school work. I'm getting creative, listening to songs by artists who inspire me, and trusting myself. A huge anxiety of mine is that my creativity isn't good enough. Being in such a practical and subjective major, it can be hard to tell if your choices are good ones, because there will always be someone who doesn't agree with your choice. Lately, I have felt so empowered by just letting myself get creative, and try to tell a story through my work. If it doesn't work out... well, at least I tried, and I'll learn from my mistakes.
I am probably the biggest theatre nerd ever, but dramaturgy makes me so excited, so being able to take an absurdist play and turn it into an art through which I can express myself is so unbelievably exciting for me. Honestly, if there's anything I'll geek-out over, it's dramaturgy, English grammar, or the DSM-V (I'm a weird girl, but I wouldn't change my quirkiness for the world).
So, what did I learn from this week?
I learned that I should have been taking care of myself this whole time. I met new people and made new connections (take that anxiety!), spent some much-needed time with family, and got the fresh perspective that I needed. I took care of my body and mind despite this really busy week, and that's a huge recovery win. I learned that I can find bits of happiness in the strangest of places, that everything happens for a reason, and that I can always find support when I need it. I learned that I have a voice, and that people are genuinely interested in hearing my story, and I've learned that I am finally starting to believe all of the things that I've been telling you: self-care isn't selfish, it's okay not to be okay, and that your body is absolutely not the enemy.
If you ever need a reminder, you know where to find me,.
Hugs,
Ally
